Your Fall 2006 Anime Guide

You fool! You haven't captured L -- that's his voice actor!

Ah, fall! Or autumn! Season of changing winds, oncoming rains, and another slew of anime premieres on Japan's airwaves. Here's a minor cross-section of what's getting underway:

Asatte no Houkou This one starts out all slice-of-lifey (read: boring), then they throw you a real curveball. A supernatural switcheroo disrupts an idyllic country summer! Humans are ... interesting!
Black Blood Brothers Hey, Alucard from Hellsing called, he wants his coat back. Come on, are they even trying with vampire stories anymore?
Busou Renkin Alchemy is so easy! From "the Rurouni Kenshin guy," except nothing to do with Kenshin really, apart from badass weaponry and fight scenes. Unfortunately it will have to exist forever in the shadow of that other famous alchemy series.
Code Geass - Lelouch of the Rebellion - CLAMP's character designs are wasted on this lumbering, pseudo-military melodrama about a ragtag Japan that struggles to break free of the global hegemony imposed by George W. Bush Western Civilization. IN THE FUTURE!!
D.Gray-man Another adaptation pulled from the pages of the Shonen Jump roster ... a young man with supernatural skills fights menacing demons, in Victorian England! I suppose it would seem cooler if it didn't feel like a bunch of genre gimmicks mashed together?
Death Note Everyone who wants to watch this is already watching this, SO. Not much else I need to say. Nice to see Studio Madhouse back in fine form, giving us rich suspenseful visuals in the mode of X and Petite Cossette. (and that opening sequence ... wow!)
Ghost Hunt This is about as mainstream as supernatural mystery series come, grounded in well-known paranormal theory. The high production values kind of depress me because this is what xxxHOLiC could have been as an animated series, if I.G hadn't been freaking cheap.
Happiness! WE WELCOME THIS HAPPINESS TONIGHT!~ o/` I mean, uh, something about a special school where "regular" students and "magic" students mix and this girl likes this guy and whatever. Cute. Pleasant. Bland.
Kanon 2006 This fanboy favorite is proof that Kyoto Animation is only as good as their source material. Is this where that "sad girls in snow" shit comes from? Anyway, this Neo-Kyon moves into a new town where all the girls are, like, Neo-Mikuru and, um ... Ayu is adorable. 'Kay.
Lovedol ~Lovely Idol~ I wish this was an acerbic send-up of the idol-pop business. I wish this was about stabbing MorningBerryzTeam48 with the parody fork. It's not. It's just some guy managing a group of young singers. I think I'll wait for IDOLM@STER, or something.
Otome wa Onee-sama [Boku] ni Koishiteru Every year across Japan, thousands of teenage boys with mildly feminine looks dress up as girls and attend impossibly fancy boarding schools. Or at least that's what a glut of such storylines would have us believe.
Pumpkin Scissors It's like, you think you've gotten used to Japan's weird titles for things, and then this comes out, which has nothing to do with pumpkins or scissors, and everything to do with alternate-world tank-busting military action.
Red Garden Very strange, very sophisticated. Four schoolmates are brought together by the death of a mutual acquaintance. Be nice if studio Gonzo could pull off the urban coolness and mystery without the superpowered silliness that Speed Grapher was.
Sumomomo Momomo Also in the running for BEST TITLE category ... a squeak named Momoko tries to make babies with a bookish lawyer-wannabe because of a marriage arrangement between their two Mortal-Kombat-type fathers. Hilarity ensues, I guess.
Tokimeki Memorial ~Only Love~ Also in the dating-sim adaptation category, a hapless young man starts a new school and meets various girls ... uh ... this kind of tepid, weak-willed trash almost makes me long for the boobtacular shamelessness of Girls Bravo and DearS.
Yamato Nadeshiko Shichihenge (Perfect Girl Evolution; The Wallflower) This season's bishounen explosion corrects most things that were flawed in the manga: more solid linework, better character differentiation, and a more pointed sense of humor. It's no Ouran, but it'll do.
Yoake Mae Yori Ruri Iro Na -Crescent Love- Okay, so some Joe Schmoe's life is changed forever when an alien-moon-princess-childhood-friend and her personal maid move into his house. What's the matter, didn't have time to make her blind, terminally ill and wheelchair-bound as well?

Also interested in, but haven't had a chance to check out yet:
Ayakashi Ayashi, Hataraki Man, Jigoku Shoujo Futakomori, Katekyo Hitman Reborn!, Kekkaishi, La Corda d'Oro (Gin-iro no Corda).

The big picture: ummmm. Lots of toothless action titles and unconvincing bishoujo prattle. But hey, that means more free time for me.